Reconsidering 10 Rounds…

Posted on February 9, 2010 by Jason

Final call for all of those with a zero score on the Paleo Challenge.  We have: Gene, Katie, Mike W., Mike K., Cat, Jason, Dave M.  anyone else?  This is your final chance.

Written by Lenora from Kosher Korner:

There's no such thing as a "dumb" question, but, some are definitely entertaining in that they challenge the obvious.  If you have been CrossFitting for at least one year, and you've found yourself asking questions like these – thank you for the entertainment.  I have inserted some important questions that are legitimate concerns. Can you tell which ones are which?

1. Q: Can I do the Wendler Strength program and stay on Paleo?
   A: Why don't you just ask if you can eat in the most healthy way possible for your body and still get stronger? Thanks for playing.

2. Q: Is this like the Starting Strength Program that Rippetoe prescribes?
   A: Read the description of the 5-3-1 programming, percentages of max, and rep schemes, and see if that's different from the 3 x a week, 3 exercises, several warm-up sets, and 3 sets of 5 rep max. Notice that the new program is about 20 additional minutes of work, 3-4 times/week, vs 2.5 hrs.  Sure. Identical! Thanks for not noticing how much extra time you have for your life outside of the gym.

3. Q: Should I drink a gallon of milk a day to get stronger on the new program?
   A: Why would that make sense during a campaign for Paleo eating.  Is Milk considered dairy?  Thanks for reading the info on the Paleo diet so carefully.

4. Q: Will the spreadsheet program calculate my weights for me?
   A: It won't guess what your 1 rep max is.  You still have to feed it that basic information.  Also – If it doesn't, do you think your forearms and thumbs are strong enough to operate a calculator?

5. Q (Asked by female): Will I get big on this program?
  A: Not unless you are among the genetic few who have the predisposition, and/or you take anabolic steroids.

6. Q (Asked by male): Will I get big on this program?
  A: Not unless you are genetically predisposed to do so, and you eat tons of food, don't do any met-cons, and, maybe, drink a gallon of milk a day like the genius who asked question #3 tried to do. 

7. Q: If I'm just doing the strength part, but, skipping the WOD on a certain day, do I still have to sign up for the class?
  A: I was hoping someone would ask that and make my day!  Are you using a bar, weights, a rack, using space in the room, someone whose healthy and safety is important to us?  UBETCHURASS!

8. Q: How important is the bench press?
  A: Who put this on the entertaining questions list? This is important. Glad you asked.  It isn't as essential as Press.  We do other, more functional exercises like push-ups and dips.  It is important in that it will help you perform better on push-ups. If it's a choice between that and Press – do Press. It's more functional.  Try not to do it the day before or day after Press. That's why Saturdays are recommended.  Oops. I feel a Shabbos question coming up for entertainment.

9. Q: What happens if we don't work out on Shabbos? How do we fit in Benches?
  A: Use the ones in Temple.  OK. I'm being a douche-bag.  You can do it on Sunday, if you aren't interfering with a class. Try to get someone to spot you. It's awkward trying to bail on this lift alone by tipping the bar to the side, or rolling it off you.  It's dangerous.  You'll piss off all the Jewish mothers.

10. Q: How do I fit this into my tight schedule? Won't this lengthen class time?
   A: Try to get here as early as possible, warm-up, and hit the strength work. If you think you may need to leave before the allotted class hour is finished, you may begin the WOD early in the next room with that clock, or in the same room, with an individual stop watch. We care about your time also, and that's why we have everyone sign-up, so we can get set up and organized.

“If you have only one smile in you give it to the people you love.” –Maya Angelou